Hello There! A lot has happened since I last wrote here. I'm not going to give you details, at least not now, but let's just say some things have changed in my life. To the untrained eye it might look as if these changes were imposed upon me from without. I, however, and my metaphysician friends, know better. Change! Isn't it absolutely wonderful! Maybe it doesn't feel so wonderful when it comes upon you suddenly and it's "bad." Whether you like it or hate it, it is what it is...and what it is is inevitable. So, why not find a way to see the good in it, to even, pray tell, make it fun!
I've been busy living full out! YAY! Life is grand. It's such a blessing to have a good life, know what I mean? I have friends and family who love me, like my company, who are happy to see me. Then there are those who don't like me, who cringe when I show up. I especially enjoy them, although in bite size, because they inspire me baby! Yes, they make me want to BE more, DO more, and HAVE more. Surely you have some delightful folks like that in your world, right? Yes, let your detractors make you even better. Someone once told me that "envy is just admiration up side down." So the next time someone hates on you, thank them for clearly they see something in you that they wish they possessed.
Let's talk more about navigating change. Our bodies change. Of course exercise can slow the aging process, so get thee butt to the gym, outdoors for a walk or skip, or in a pool. Our relationships shift. Once upon a time me and my sister Ayo were the envy of the Ricks clan because we did so much together. We did our favorite festivals together, the Baltimore Book Festival and Artscape. We braved cold nights to see Dr. Maya Angelou, Nikki Giovanni, James Baldwin, Haile Gerima. The posse, which was Ayo, her son Baba, my daughter Adia, and our mother Mattie Ricks, would take nice family vacations together. Then things changed. And I couldn't blame it on school and work. I thought my sister didn't love me anymore. Then I discovered I was still loved. That both my sister and I needed some breathing space so we could better find our true selves. Our relationship today is different, stronger, more authentic. What appeared to be the end of a relationship was but the end of a way of being together. That had to die for something more real to be born. Over time, all relationships morph. They must because we change. Let them. If that means goodbye, say it in love. Love abounds. Don't worry, be happy.
We have a choice. We can resist change and boohoo all over the place. Hold onto people, jobs, situations as if we can't live without them. Or we can accept change with grace, maybe even embrace it. We can see change as the gift that it is. If we get fired from a job or relationship it's only the Universe telling us it's time to grow. See, because humans so fear change we too often stay in places and relationships where we are no longer wanted. Listen, you are wanted elsewhere. Somebody, somewhere...over there, is waiting for you. Since they want you and what you got they'll appreciate you. Now tell me, don't you think you deserve to be appreciated? Sure you do. I don't know about you, but I'm determined to only be with people who appreciate me.
Tomorrow, initiate change. Go a different way to work. Wear red instead of black. Comb your hair back instead of forward, even if you feel a bit odd. LoL Now notice how alive you feel. Learning how to roll with small changes prepares us for bigger, scarier changes that seem to be imposed upon us by others. To paraphrase what someone famous once said, "What lies behind us and before us are no match for what lies within us." If you remember that you'll know how to roll with the changes in your life...and might even discover you sort of like change. Uh, maybe.
Smooches! DeBora
DeBora M. Ricks
Speaker/Editor/Writer Coach & Consultant/Attorney
Author of Love Addicted: One Woman’s Spiritual Journey through Emotional Dependency
http://deboraricks.blogspot.com
Next Book! Why Did He Break Up With Me?
Lessons in Love, Loss and Letting Go
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